Ninja Assassin Review

It’s kind of a shame that a great title like “There Will Be Blood” was wasted on a film about an oilman.

Not only could it be used as a substitute for any of the 27 “Saw” movies, but it would also perfectly describe “Ninja Assassin”, the latest production from the Wachowski Brothers (“The Matrix”).

Then again, “Ninja Assassin” is a pretty damn concise title in its own right.

In case you couldn’t guess (or you thought the title was ironic), the movie follows Raizo (played by Korean pop star Rain), a – wait for it – ninja assassin who trained how to be a killer from a very early age until he and the rest of his clan had a disagreement.

Eventually, Raizo teams up with pretty (of course she’s pretty, this is a movie) Europol agent Mika (Naomie Harris), who uncovers the idea that real-live ninjas have been performing political assassinations for years and becomes a target.

Personally, I thought that would’ve been an interesting angle for the movie to explore. However, director James McTeigue (“V for Vendetta”) and co-writers Matthew Sand and J. Michael Straczynski had other ideas.

Maybe it’s because I saw this movie at around 10:40 a.m. (it was probably too early in the morning for me to see people’s heads exploding and arms and legs being sliced off), but I was taken aback at first by the insane ultraviolence in this movie. (Another contributing factor was probably the relatively low-key ad campaign for this movie – then again, what did I expect walking into a movie called “Ninja Assassin”?!)

I’m no prude, and I eventually settled into the movie’s crazed rhythm. I just wish that if the movie were going to go SO gleefully over-the-top with the violence, it would extend that sense of playfulness to other parts of the flick.

Instead, what we get is a fairly humorless and (even worse) standard tale about a lone martial arts warrior who survived excruciating training (told through one or two too many flashbacks), loses a woman he loves and vows revenge. I’m not saying the tone had to be “Kung Fu Hustle” goofy, but the non-action scenes could’ve definitely used some sense of playfulness.

It’s a shame too because I got the feeling Rain could’ve been a completely magnetic lead if given the chance. He certainly looked the part physically, but I would’ve liked to have seen a little more of the star’s charisma shine through. Instead, Harris probably gives the movie’s most appealing performance, while Sho Kosugi is scary and completely badass as the cruel leader of the ninja assassin clan.

Of course, the real star of the movie is the action sequences. The massacre that opens the movie will grab your attention, to say the least. I actually enjoyed the more subtle effect of having the ninjas appear and disappear through the shadows.

In the end, “Ninja Assassin” probably accomplished what it set out to do — that would be entertaining audiences with its impressive, over-the-top action sequences.

I just wish the movie would’ve had a little more fun doing it.

Ninja Assassin…C+