NFL 2008 Week 15 Picks

Excuse me for feeling a bit untouchable.

I'd clinched a playoff spot in my NFL.com league (and my team apparently decided to take the week off and get creamed), but I needed help to make the playoffs in my Yahoo Sports league. I needed to win (which I did) and I needed one of two teams to lose.

After the Sunday games, one of those two teams had won and the other team I needed to lose had a 55 point lead AND Steve Smith (100+ receiving yards and 1TD) on Monday Night Football. Things were NOT looking good. Fortunately (for me!), his opponent had Jeff Garcia (300+ passing yards, 2TDs), Jonathan Stewart (100+ rushing yards, 2TDs) and my new best friend Antonio Bryant (pictured, left, with 200 receiving yards, 2TDs), who all combined for 100 points and helped get me into the playoffs. It was a (three weeks before) Christmas miracle! I think I may have actually let out a Kevin Garnett "ANYTHING'S POSSSIBBBBLLLEEEE!!!"

I excelled only slightly less with my picks (11-5 week, 131-76-1 overall), but, given my extraordinary good fortunate lately, I'm going for 16-0 this week. Why not? After all, ANYTHING'S POSSSIBBBBLLLEEEE!!!!

NEW ORLEANS @ CHICAGO
I want to pick the Saints because Drew Brees is the starting QB on both my fantasy teams and I like to see him and his team play well (they're fun to watch). Of course, the team could do badly and he could still put up great numbers. That's what I see happening tonight. The Saints are a different team on the road — they're a bad team.

TAMPA BAY @ ATLANTA
After getting spanked on national TV by Carolina there's just no way the Bucs DON'T come back this week and kickass, despite the fact that Atlanta is very good at home. Their loss on Monday Night Football was THAT embarrassing.

WASHINGTON @ CINCINNATI
RB Clinton Portis may have sarcastically called head coach Jim Zorn a genius, but it doesn't take a genius to beat the Bengals. Actually, pretty much all you have to do is show up.

DETROIT @ INDIANAPOLIS
So NOW sportscasters are coming around to the idea that the Lions CAN go 0-16. Welcome to reality, fellas.

SAN DIEGO @ KANSAS CITY
I just generally like the Chiefs at home and I think that, despite their best efforts, they won't be able to give this game away the way they've given away about five wins this year.

SEATTLE @ ST. LOUIS
Don't wake the Rams. They've obviously decided to take the rest of the season off and need their beauty sleep.

SAN FRANCISCO @ MIAMI
I like the suddenly-frisky 49ers, but I like Miami even better, especially if they keep winning and "Chad Pennington for MVP" talk heats up.

BUFFALO @ N.Y. JETS
Ok, as bad as the Jets have been the last two weeks, we've established that the Bills can't beat ANYONE who's any good. The 8-5 Jets count as "any good."

TENNESSEE @ HOUSTON
I know they don't have the conference sewn up quite yet, but don't we think the Titans start taking a mental nap until the playoffs pretty soon? On a related note, ok, fine! The Texans have sucked me back in again, damnit!

GREEN BAY @ JACKSONVILLE
These two teams will play this weekend, but they're also battling it out for a spot on the bed next to the Rams for that rest-of-the-season nap. Actually, I take it back — at least the Packers look like they're still trying.

MINNESOTA @ ARIZONA
Reports coming out of Minnesota say that Tarvaris Jackson will start at QB. In a related story, I'm going with the team that doesn't have Tarvaris Jackson starting at QB.

DENVER @ CAROLINA
Yes, they ran for 300 yards against a VERY good Bucs defense, so logic states they'd run for 750 yards against a terrible Denver defense. However, I'm betting the Panthers start believing their own "Super Bowl contender" hype and stumble this week.

PITTSBURGH @ BALTIMORE
Both of these teams are playing great. They each have a fantastic defense, Baltimore has the edge in the running game, but I'm going with Pittsburgh because their quarterback has championship-level experience.

NEW ENGLAND @ OAKLAND
You just know Randy Moss has been eagerly waiting for the chance to stick it to the team that traded him for a mere fourth-round pick. Actually, Moss should bring a present to Oakland this weekend to show appreciation for saving his career by trading him to the Pats.

N.Y. GIANTS @ DALLAS
The Giants finally stumbled, while Dallas pretty much does what it always does (losing on the road against a good team with Tony Romo making a key error). I look for the Boys to change it up this week and lose at home against a good team with Romo making a key error.

CLEVELAND @ PHILADELPHIA
The Ken Dorsey area did NOT get off to a great start. I'm sure Philly fans will be welcoming and sympathetic on Monday Night.