Nip/Tuck/Thoughts: Plastic Surgery is SO 2004

“Nip/Tuck” decided to go all meta on us in its antepenultimate episode. (Yeah, I could’ve said “next to next to last episode”, but where’s the fun in that?)

If you’ve read this recap before, you’ve heard me repeatedly state that this show stopped being a serious drama a LONG time ago. (And how I’m mostly ok with that, as long as it didn’t pretend like it was still a serious drama.)

What I usually don’t mention (but is just as true) is that “Nip/Tuck” seems to have stopped being relevant in the mainstream shortly after the identity of the Carver was revealed at the end of season 3. The show still performed solidly for FX, but it never, EVER recaptured the buzz it had during those first few seasons. Now, (other than the people kind enough to respond to this column) I don’t even know anyone who cares that there are two episodes left.

I feel like the “plastic surgery is SO 2004” sentiment that dominated “Christian Troy II” was a(n unintentional?) reflection of the show itself. (“Nip/Tuck” is SO 2004!) Watching Sean and Christian futilely strive to remain relevant was bittersweet. It made for some interesting drama, but it also reminded us that this show really is past its sell-by date.

The feeling came to the forefront when Sean and Christian were visited by a real-estate agent couple they’d worked on in Miami. They wanted McNamara/Troy to reverse all the work they’d done for free because their artificially plastic faces were bad for business. Sean and Christian refused, stating that they both looked terrific. (The wife looked ok, but the husband looked like a cat.)

Still, since Sean is a malleable chump, he decided to try out some facial injectables, which were apparently the quicker and cheaper wave of the future. Of course, like most things that are quicker and cheaper, the facial injectables also didn’t work as well. Honestly, the only surprising part of this storyline was that Christian did NOT hook up with the tasty facial injectable doctor. (Although he DID feel some boob and butt, so you can say he hit a solid double.)

To show people that plastic surgery was the best, “no big deal” alternative, Christian insisted on getting a feather lift, filming the procedure and putting it on YouTube. I mean, what could possibly go wrong with that?!

I may be a bit more squeamish than most viewers, but the excellent prosthetics used for this show’s surgical sequences consistently creep me out. So it was easy for me to guess anyone watching on YouTube would have a similar reaction. I actually thought the shot of a lonely Christian sitting sadly and confusedly looking at his laptop was the most effective part of the episode. It was even more effective than the sequence that’ll probably get the most attention.

I’m referring, of course, to Christian’s anesthesia-induced dream. Yes, seeing Joan Rivers (as herself and as Kimber) was amusing, and the return of Joan Von Ark and Donna Mills was random (I would’ve rather seen the return of paper bag girl). However, the sequence went on a bit too long for my taste and ended up feeling way too hokey in the end.

It’s too bad because the more subtle parts (Christian asking “Am I really this ugly?” after getting the cruel lipstick treatment he gave Kimber and others) were very effective. I also enjoyed Christian’s epiphany toward the end of the episode as to why he’s such an asshole. He pushes the people close to him away and ends meaningful relationships before anyone or anything else has a chance to hurt him.

Either way, it seems more likely than ever that the show will end with the lights being turned out at McNamara/Troy.

If I can make one request before that happens – can Liz get one meaningful, non-neurotic/abusive relationship with someone who won’t steal a vital organ?

I feel kind of like a fool for believing that person could actually be Daniela, the bi-curious pharmaceutical rep who Liz hooked up with last night. I thought their tentative flirting was cute, and I liked seeing Liz in the lead as a sexy and confident woman. Unfortunately, Liz didn’t like getting, um, sprayed in the face, so the relationship was doomed. (I’m guessing if things had gone better in bed, Daniela wouldn’t have gone back to her husband.)

With only two episodes left, I was disappointed to see Liz yet again left sobbing after being rejected by another romantic prospect?

So what do you think of this episode? Does Liz (or any other character on this show) deserve a happy ending? How do you think Ava Moore (Famke Janssen, where have you been?!) will figure into next week’s episode? Were you surprised by how much thinner Julian McMahon looked in season 1? Finally, would you watch a surgical procedure on YouTube?