American Idol: Mad Scientist

I have mixed feelings about the latest episode of “American Idol.”
On the one hand, I’m completely happy that we finally got an episode that was NOT mostly made of suck. (Hey, it only took a month and a half!)

On the other hand, my opinions on the performances from the 10 remaining ladies ran SO counter at times to what the judges were saying, that I felt like I was taking crazy pills.

Let’s break down who’s in, who’s (likely) out, and who’s in between:

WHO’S IN

If reports that Crystal Bowersox had been in the hospital the day before — due to diabetes complications — hadn’t set the Internet on fire, I would’ve had no idea that there was anything wrong with her. (Ok, so she looked a little pale to me, but I could just be projecting.)

Anyway, her take on Creedence Clearwater Revival’s “Long as I Can See the Light” was effortlessly terrific in a way some of Crystal’s screamier contenders for the season 9 “Idol” crown can only dream of. I’m still not sure the 2010 music landscape needs another Jewel (thanks Erica, for the apt comparison), but this competition DEFINITELY needs someone as cool and talented as Crystal. (How funny was her calling out Simon for never riding the subway.)

I even think she’s cool enough to withstand the inevitable backlash that’ll come from the way the judges fawned over her last night. I’m guessing some people will get annoyed and that we’ll be hearing whispers that she’s overrated (look what’s happening to “The Hurt Locker” leading up to the Oscars), but I believe her underdog charms will inevitably carry the day.

As much as I think Crystal is cool, my (and Simon’s) favorite contestant is getting to be Siobhan Magnus. Sure, her glory note on “Think” was greater than the whole, but I like that she’s a little off and isn’t afraid to tackle anything with that big voice of hers. (I’m also happy to see she stopped dressing like an 80’s sitcom character — she’s quirky enough on her own without dressing weird.)

Still, if Crystal was the judges’ favorite on Tuesday, and Siobhan is my favorite girl in the competition, my (non-existent) award for best performance goes to Katelyn Epperly (pictured, left). Obviously, I don’t have the music industry experience or credibility three out of the four judges possess, but I was shocked when they gave her cover of “The Scientist” such tepid reviews. They slammed it for being slow. Sure, it was slow (it IS a ballad), but it was never boring. In fact, it was completely engaging throughout. I would've been pissed off if I were Katelyn, who, it turns out, like Rebecca Romijn without last week’s clown makeup.

I wasn’t quite as flabbergasted when they tripped over themselves to praise Lily Scott’s “Idol” moment, but I WAS a bit taken aback. Don’t get me wrong, I thought her jazzy, acoustic take on “A Change is Gonna Come” was cool, but she seemed to push her voice too hard and appeared to run out of gas in the second half of the song. I actually didn’t think it was THAT much better than her performance last week. I liked it (and I like Lilly), but I didn’t really see this as an “Idol moment” we’re going to be referencing three years from now. (Assuming this show didn’t implode after Simon’s departure.)

I SHOULD SAY THEY’RE IN TROUBLE, BUT THEY’RE NOT

You know, other than identifying the wrong Alanis song that Crystal sang last week and sitting so creepily close to Simon, I thought Kara was pretty right on last night.

That includes her comment to Katie that, just because “Put Your Records On” sounds good on the radio, doesn’t necessarily mean it’ll translate to the live stage. Also not translating to the live stage is Katie, who still appears unsure of herself — her performance didn’t even get (sorta) good until it was almost over. Erica thinks the 17-year-old should be sent to the Disney Channel to replace Selena Gomez, and I don’t disagree.

Another place the judges (except for Randy) and I differed was with Michelle Delamor. I admire her guts for covering Creed in front of 30 million people (last I checked, we’re not in the year 2000), and her arrangement was actually pretty solid. The problem was, um, her. She was WEAK. Simon said the first half was better than the second half, and I agree. The problem is that the second half was supposed to be the most dynamic part of her performance, and Michelle wouldn’t (or probably couldn’t) hit the big notes to take her performance to the next level. Still, the fact that she even picked a Creed song (and not another Alicia Keys song) lets me know that we might be in for some more interesting (yet underwhelming) performances down the line.

I SHOULDN’T SAY THEY’RE IN TROUBLE, BUT THEY ARE

Ok, what the hell was the judges’ problem with Didi Benami?

Sure, she didn’t reinvent the wheel with “Lean on Me”, but I actually didn’t think it was a bad song choice at all. I liked hearing an unexpected voice on SUUUUCCCHH a familiar song, and Didi performed it pretty well. I can understand the judges not loving it, but I’ll never understand why they absolutely trashed it. It’s a good thing Didi didn’t try to talk to Ryan afterwards because she would’ve definitely cried. (Maybe, I’m just defensive because Didi kinda reminds me of Cat Deeley and everybody likes Cat Deeley.)

I’D PACK MY SUITCASE IF I WERE YOU

It’s not that I think Paige Miles is one of the three worst singers (though I also don’t think she’s the best, as Simon insists). It’s just that I don’t see how doing a soundalike cover of Kelly Clarkson’s “Walk Away” (one of the few Clarkson songs that don’t have a big moment) is supposed to get people excited about voting for you when they don’t know who the hell you are.

I think Paige is gone, and I think that she’ll be joined by Lacey Brown. I sort of gave Lacey a pass after last week’s absolutely disastrous “Landslide” performance because her previous “Over the Rainbow” was so good. However, she hasn’t built up the amount of goodwill, say, Andrew Garcia has in the bank with his “Straight Up.” As a result, her painful take on “Kiss Me” (at Kara’s behest) should and will get her sent home. (At least it’s good to know that she takes requests.)

That means we’ll have another week of Haeley Vaughn, butchering another song. I’m not saying that to criticize her or praise her, it’s just what’s going to happen. Kara was absolutely right in pointing out that she’s a few years away from being a real contender in this competition. (Which made me wonder why the hell they let her through in the first place!) This week, she chopped apart “The Climb” (which I actually really like) almost as badly as Miley Cyrus does when she sings it live. That goes to show that just because Haeley picked a song by a fellow teenager, it doesn’t mean she can’t make it sound like a plodding mess.

So what’d you think of this episode? Are the judges over doing it in praising Crystal? Was Didi really THAT bad? What will Katelyn dress as next week? Why does Simon insist on proving to us that he can grow chest hair? Finally, who do you think is going home this week? (I’ve got John, Jermaine, Paige and Lacey.)