During the second performance episode of “Dancing with the Stars”, a couple of frontrunners faltered (slightly), and new contenders emerged. At least Wendy Williams and “Psycho” Mike Catherwood stayed consistently sucky! The 11 couples performed a jive or a quickstep to win our votes and avoid the harsh red light of elimination. Here’s how they did, in order of appearance. Sugar Ray Leonard and Anna: I’d love to tell you all about this dance, but I honestly don’t remember much about it. I’m thinking 25 percent of the reason was because Leonard danced first, and 75 percent of the reason was because it was completely forgettable. I remember purple and gold…a short red wig. I have a vague recollection of atrocious jive kicks (point your toes!) and some embarrassing, boxing-related choreography. I also remember thinking for the second week in a row that Leonard has a surprisingly high performance quality. I think he deserves another week to make an impression. Kendra Wilkinson and Louis: During her rehearsal footage, we got to hear Kendra lament about how she’s a tomboy and doesn’t feel like much of a lady. (Cut to Louis van Amstel having Kelly Osbourne flashbacks.) I’m not usually in the business of belittling anyone’s personal issues, but it’s hard for me to completely empathize with the super-famous Playboy model with the world-class chesticles who doesn’t know how to feel like a girl. Oh well. I’m just glad she didn’t let her gloominess bring down her quickstep. Once again, I was surprised by how delighted I was watching her dance, since she’s actually kind of bad. So far, she’s been very adept at picking up Louis’ challenging choreography, but I’m not sure if she’ll stick around to get comfortable enough to infuse her routines with personality and precision. Chelsea Kane and Mark (pictured, right): Oooh, look how young and rebellious they are! They’re too cool and too hip to do an actual jive…traditional jives are for old fogies! I can appreciate the artistry in what Mark accomplished with his circus mime routine, but I’d appreciate it even more if this had been a freestyle performance. This wasn’t a jive — it was a freestyle with bits of jive thrown-in. The main reason I’m so annoyed is because Chelsea actually nailed this difficult routine and is probably the best dancer in this competition. Mark needs to stop wasting her time. Chris Jericho and Cheryl: I think Jericho’s shockingly light-footed quickstep was the best dance of the night. The thoroughly charming and traditional performance was especially welcome after the jive circus that preceded it. Chris succeeded in providing a strong frame from Cheryl — he had especially ordered from 18th century Danish Vikings — and in delivering a fun, charismatic performance. Never mind that he mostly did it because he appears to be scared of Cheryl. Petra Nemcova and Dmitry: Baring skin is nothing new on “Dancing with the Stars” (hell, it’s one of the 10 commandments), but Petra’s revealing, McDonald’s-tinted red and gold outfit did her no favors from a dancing perspective. I mean, from a life perspective, she looked phenomenal. Unfortunately, as a dancer it was easier to see how weak her core is and how ungainly some of her arm and leg movements were during this jive. She’s not the first tall model/super-skinny girl to deal with similar problems. I’m just not sure that Petra will get enough time on the dance floor to figure things out, Erin Andrews-style. Kirstie Alley and Maks: Congratulations if you had Kirstie Alley in your “Who Will Make the First Charlie Sheen Reference This Season?” pool. Too bad, that was more of a “Winning” moment than the quickstep that proceeded it. It wasn’t terrible by any means, but it was a clear step back from last week when Kirstie looked livelier and more comfortable on the dance floor. This week, it seemed like she ran out of gas halfway through (understandable during a quickstep), but was able to finish strong like any good performer. Here’s hoping the narrative of her rehearsal packages from now on isn’t always, “Would a skinny girl struggle with this too?” (I can seem Maks getting sick of that VERY quickly.) Mike Catherwood and Lacey: I actually thought his jive kicks were pretty great, and might’ve been the best of the night. Seriously! Unfortunately, everything else was pretty terrible. He somehow manages to be stiff in both his legs AND his shoulders and arms, which is impressive for anyone who isn’t Frankenstein’s monster. All that being said, I’m pulling for him to come back next week because he honestly seems to be trying and interested in doing well. My girlfriend, Erica, is interested in seeing him come back because she thinks he’s hot. Unfortunately, I don’t think either of us will get our wishes. Romeo and Chelsie: Len called this jive the best dance of the night, and I started to wonder if there was actually something to all the digs Tom was taking at the senior judge. Don’t get me wrong: Romeo’s jive was entertaining, but I didn’t think it was nearly elegant or fluid enough to garner such high marks. Then again, maybe I’m just annoyed because Romeo generally came off as a jackass during his rehearsal segment. Making Chelsie feel his abs…yeah, I’m sure as a professional dancer, she’s never been around a guy with good abs. (Chelsie, for her part, looks to be a complete trooper.) Wendy Williams and Tony: Like Kirstie Alley during her quickstep, she seemed to run out of gas halfway through. Unlike Kirstie Alley, Wendy Williams didn’t really recover to finish strong (throwing a bucket of gold confetti on your partner DOES NOT qualify as “recoring”) and didn’t appear to be dancing that vigorously in the first place. She’s just not as entertaining as I want her to be, and I think she deserves to be eliminated. But she probably won’t be. Ralph Macchio and Karina: As all the judges went out of their way to point out, watching Ralph dance is a joy to watch…even if his over-aggressive jive made him look like a spastic psycho at times. The good news is that if he keeps that intensity up, he’ll get 10s for his paso dobe. The other good news is that he has a teenage son named Daniel who looks and talks just like him. Daniel?! Hines Ward and Kym: I didn’t go as gaga for this routine as the judges did, but Hines and Kym might be my favorite couple on this season of “Dancing with the Stars.” Their chemistry on the dance floor is terrific and pleasing to watch. Their chemistry during rehearsal can use a little work, but hopefully Hines will be able to teach Kym enough American lingo to survive in the mean streets of Pittsburgh. I didn’t know that I wanted to hear someone say “Hey shawty” with an Australian accent until I heard it last night. So what’d you think of this episode? Do you think the kiss at the end of Kirstie and Maks’ routine really spontaneous? Is Romeo aware that the 90’s are part of the 1900’s? (“I was born in the 90’s, not the 1900’s!”) Finally, who do you think is going home? I think it’ll be Psycho Mike, but I hope it’ll be Wendy.
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
Dancing with the Stars: Jive Fools
During the second performance episode of “Dancing with the Stars”, a couple of frontrunners faltered (slightly), and new contenders emerged. At least Wendy Williams and “Psycho” Mike Catherwood stayed consistently sucky! The 11 couples performed a jive or a quickstep to win our votes and avoid the harsh red light of elimination. Here’s how they did, in order of appearance. Sugar Ray Leonard and Anna: I’d love to tell you all about this dance, but I honestly don’t remember much about it. I’m thinking 25 percent of the reason was because Leonard danced first, and 75 percent of the reason was because it was completely forgettable. I remember purple and gold…a short red wig. I have a vague recollection of atrocious jive kicks (point your toes!) and some embarrassing, boxing-related choreography. I also remember thinking for the second week in a row that Leonard has a surprisingly high performance quality. I think he deserves another week to make an impression. Kendra Wilkinson and Louis: During her rehearsal footage, we got to hear Kendra lament about how she’s a tomboy and doesn’t feel like much of a lady. (Cut to Louis van Amstel having Kelly Osbourne flashbacks.) I’m not usually in the business of belittling anyone’s personal issues, but it’s hard for me to completely empathize with the super-famous Playboy model with the world-class chesticles who doesn’t know how to feel like a girl. Oh well. I’m just glad she didn’t let her gloominess bring down her quickstep. Once again, I was surprised by how delighted I was watching her dance, since she’s actually kind of bad. So far, she’s been very adept at picking up Louis’ challenging choreography, but I’m not sure if she’ll stick around to get comfortable enough to infuse her routines with personality and precision. Chelsea Kane and Mark (pictured, right): Oooh, look how young and rebellious they are! They’re too cool and too hip to do an actual jive…traditional jives are for old fogies! I can appreciate the artistry in what Mark accomplished with his circus mime routine, but I’d appreciate it even more if this had been a freestyle performance. This wasn’t a jive — it was a freestyle with bits of jive thrown-in. The main reason I’m so annoyed is because Chelsea actually nailed this difficult routine and is probably the best dancer in this competition. Mark needs to stop wasting her time. Chris Jericho and Cheryl: I think Jericho’s shockingly light-footed quickstep was the best dance of the night. The thoroughly charming and traditional performance was especially welcome after the jive circus that preceded it. Chris succeeded in providing a strong frame from Cheryl — he had especially ordered from 18th century Danish Vikings — and in delivering a fun, charismatic performance. Never mind that he mostly did it because he appears to be scared of Cheryl. Petra Nemcova and Dmitry: Baring skin is nothing new on “Dancing with the Stars” (hell, it’s one of the 10 commandments), but Petra’s revealing, McDonald’s-tinted red and gold outfit did her no favors from a dancing perspective. I mean, from a life perspective, she looked phenomenal. Unfortunately, as a dancer it was easier to see how weak her core is and how ungainly some of her arm and leg movements were during this jive. She’s not the first tall model/super-skinny girl to deal with similar problems. I’m just not sure that Petra will get enough time on the dance floor to figure things out, Erin Andrews-style. Kirstie Alley and Maks: Congratulations if you had Kirstie Alley in your “Who Will Make the First Charlie Sheen Reference This Season?” pool. Too bad, that was more of a “Winning” moment than the quickstep that proceeded it. It wasn’t terrible by any means, but it was a clear step back from last week when Kirstie looked livelier and more comfortable on the dance floor. This week, it seemed like she ran out of gas halfway through (understandable during a quickstep), but was able to finish strong like any good performer. Here’s hoping the narrative of her rehearsal packages from now on isn’t always, “Would a skinny girl struggle with this too?” (I can seem Maks getting sick of that VERY quickly.) Mike Catherwood and Lacey: I actually thought his jive kicks were pretty great, and might’ve been the best of the night. Seriously! Unfortunately, everything else was pretty terrible. He somehow manages to be stiff in both his legs AND his shoulders and arms, which is impressive for anyone who isn’t Frankenstein’s monster. All that being said, I’m pulling for him to come back next week because he honestly seems to be trying and interested in doing well. My girlfriend, Erica, is interested in seeing him come back because she thinks he’s hot. Unfortunately, I don’t think either of us will get our wishes. Romeo and Chelsie: Len called this jive the best dance of the night, and I started to wonder if there was actually something to all the digs Tom was taking at the senior judge. Don’t get me wrong: Romeo’s jive was entertaining, but I didn’t think it was nearly elegant or fluid enough to garner such high marks. Then again, maybe I’m just annoyed because Romeo generally came off as a jackass during his rehearsal segment. Making Chelsie feel his abs…yeah, I’m sure as a professional dancer, she’s never been around a guy with good abs. (Chelsie, for her part, looks to be a complete trooper.) Wendy Williams and Tony: Like Kirstie Alley during her quickstep, she seemed to run out of gas halfway through. Unlike Kirstie Alley, Wendy Williams didn’t really recover to finish strong (throwing a bucket of gold confetti on your partner DOES NOT qualify as “recoring”) and didn’t appear to be dancing that vigorously in the first place. She’s just not as entertaining as I want her to be, and I think she deserves to be eliminated. But she probably won’t be. Ralph Macchio and Karina: As all the judges went out of their way to point out, watching Ralph dance is a joy to watch…even if his over-aggressive jive made him look like a spastic psycho at times. The good news is that if he keeps that intensity up, he’ll get 10s for his paso dobe. The other good news is that he has a teenage son named Daniel who looks and talks just like him. Daniel?! Hines Ward and Kym: I didn’t go as gaga for this routine as the judges did, but Hines and Kym might be my favorite couple on this season of “Dancing with the Stars.” Their chemistry on the dance floor is terrific and pleasing to watch. Their chemistry during rehearsal can use a little work, but hopefully Hines will be able to teach Kym enough American lingo to survive in the mean streets of Pittsburgh. I didn’t know that I wanted to hear someone say “Hey shawty” with an Australian accent until I heard it last night. So what’d you think of this episode? Do you think the kiss at the end of Kirstie and Maks’ routine really spontaneous? Is Romeo aware that the 90’s are part of the 1900’s? (“I was born in the 90’s, not the 1900’s!”) Finally, who do you think is going home? I think it’ll be Psycho Mike, but I hope it’ll be Wendy.
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