Dancing with the Stars: Oh yes it's Ladies Night

That's three straight seasons that I've told myself I'm not going to waste my time writing a recap for "Dancing with the Stars" and three straight times I've been sucked in.

Looking at this particular roster of celebs, I was certain that this would be the skippable year in DWTS. I mean, what's an Albert Reed or a Cameron Mathison or a Josie Maran (pictured).

But there I was again, right back in it after hearing the familiar/cheesy Latin flavory song and a cool, up-tempo (and slightly drawn out) opening routine by the professional dancers. Most importantly, my hopes were lifted sky high when I saw Drew Lachey co-hosting with Tom Bergeron until I found out regular(ly awful) co-host Samantha Harris is only temporarily away on maternity leave. Oh well.

Then Jennie Garth of 90210 fame came out and nearly basically crapped the bed as far as all my goodwill was concerned. Her cha cha (or is it cha cha cha?) to an awkward version of "Uptown Girl" wasn't exactly terrible, it was just that she was so nervous that she looked like she'd rather be anywhere else but there.

Oh did I mention that for this season's premiere the male and female stars would be performing on different nights. At first, I was disappointed because I thought it was just a way for ABC to drag out the show and milk their cash cow (which it is), but then I realized that it's kinda cool to see the female (and eventually male) celebrities pitted against each other, as opposed to comparing them to professionals.

Anyway, as terrified as Jennie Garth was, supermodel Josie Maran looked like she was having a great time out there. The only problem is that she was terrible. It's too bad because I like her, probably based mostly on her rehearsal footage where partner Alec Mazzo described her as "deceptively unfit", which immediately took the lead as my favorite phrase of the new fall season. Unfortunately, like Paulina Porizkova, Josie has NO following and will almost certainly be the first to go.

On the other hand, Cheetah Girl Sabrina Bryan came out and set the dance floor on fire with her cha cha. Sure she integrated hip hop moves which cranky old Len predictably shot down, but Sabrina is clearly moving at a different speed and at a higher level than her female competitors. Now if only we could get her to stop saying "cheetahlicious."

Meanwhile Marie Osmond's fox trot was actually my least favorite dance of the night. Marie's clearly having fun out there, but I just don't see how she can get significantly better to make an impact on the competition or, more importantly, entertain me. She was only half joking about there being 22 million Osmonds out there so she'll be around the competition for a few weeks.

I've never found Mel B. particularly Scary (ooh, she's black and has crazy hair – scary!) but last night I found her to be the most fun competitor. And she's got the perfect partner in Maksim, who she met enthusiastically met by saying "you're hot and full of yourself". Which, of course, is true. Her cha cha was lots of fun and I'm looking forward to watching this couple. Mel B. is basically just like Laila Ali, Maksim's former partner. Only gigglier and more smiley when she dances. This is my favorite couple so far. Also, Mel B. kinda reminds me of my mom from pictures I've seen of her before she had me.

Speaking of my mom, the final competitor of the evening, Jane Seymour, 56, is a year younger than my mom (and I'm sure my mom would appreciate me revealing that fact). It's a REALLY good thing nobody reads this.

Anyway, I got a huge kick out of the fact that self-professed DWTS fanatic Jane Seymour was considerably more excited about meeting her professional partner then he was of her (though he's also a big fan). Also, the couple took a commanding lead in "awwws" as they repeatedly discussed how thrilled and honored they were to be dancing with each other. It really had the potential to be sickening, but these two are so classy that it never crosses that line. Finally, it helps that Dr. Quinn can dance!

So which female celebrity was your favorite? Who do you think is going home? Which male "celebrity" are you most looking forward to seeing?