Well that was an eventful episode of "Top Model."Tyra took time off from her ridiculously watchable talk show to actually teach the girls something, we saw the formation of a powerful new faction, the contestants competed in an interesting photo shoot, one of them went naked, and Claire (pictured, right) let us know that she’s worried about the breast milk she’s been pumping drying up.
Ok, so maybe it was a little too eventful.
I have to say, at first I didn’t really care about the latest fight-about-nothing in the "Top Model" house. This week it was perpetual Cover Girl of the Week Claire getting annoyed with Dominique for not shutting off her alarm clock (which went off a few hours too early) in a timely manner. This was the second week in a row Dominique — who weirdly looks like a manlier (and uglier) Portia di Rossi in the face — got into a fracas with one of the girls.
I was sort of tuning out all the ambient noise until awkward girl Lauren flipped out, jumped on a chair and started screaming at Dominique like a lunatic. She was quickly joined by Whitney (who Dominique brawled with last week), and it wasn’t long before the three girls ganged up on Dominique. The way this episode was edited made it look like Claire, Whitney and Lauren hung out together the entire time they were at the house — except, of course, when Claire was pumping her breast milk.
Later, the three of them behaved pretty cruelly toward Dominique, trashing her while she was lying in bed sick (though I don’t think they knew she was sick). Still, it would’ve been a lot easier for me to feel sorry for Dominique if she weren’t such an abrasive, delusional, egotistical psychopath. Honestly, the way this girl argues makes no sense. After Claire called her a bitch, Dominique comes back with "Would you call your husband a bitch if he didn’t turn off his alarm clock?" That doesn’t even make sense! Let me help you, Dom: the answer is no — Claire is calling you a bitch because you’re acting like, well, a bitch. Sorry.
That being said, it was disappointing to see Claire, Whitney and Lauren, three of the stronger contenders this cycle, dragged down into Dominique’s level. Then again, she’s so frustrating to "argue" with, that you just can’t help it.
Fortunately, things livened up considerably when Tyra showed up out of nowhere as the girls’ cabbie, ordered them to dress like sticks of red lipstick and schooled them on walking (allow three seconds for maximum fierceness).
If you’re a regular reader of this column you know that I love it when Tyra "acts," and we got to see her "skills" as she pretended to sprain her ankle to teach the girls to "think pain, but beauty." This entire session seemed to help most of the girls, who are sometimes unfairly chided for not knowing how to model, despite the fact that no one ever taught them anything.
Tyra had them act out several ailments, and the girls did a nice job for the most part. The only exception was Lauren, who was supposed to act like her hands hurt from patty cake (good luck with that one), but instead looked like a drug addict. I also could’ve done without watching someone do "Period Pain" (but beauty).
Anya and her "shoulder pain" was the challenge winner and, to be honest, this was the first time this season she’s ever stood out for me (other than vaguely looking like an alien with her bleached blonde hair and light eyes). Her reward was a vaguely creepy nude, I mean "timeless" photo shoot with noted fashion photographer Nigel Barker. Um, isn’t this more of a reward for Nigel.
Thankfully, Aimee wasn’t the recipient of this "reward". She once again reiterated her family’s Mormon convictions and her aversion to being photographed nude. The odd focus on Aimee (not in a positive way) pretty much signaled her appearance in the bottom two this week. I wish the editors of this show wouldn’t make it so painfully obvious who’s going to be on the chopping block after the photo shoot.
This week, the models had to pose as different genres of music, leading to some creative (and some not-so-creative) shots. My favorites were Whitney (great expression on her face) who was called first, and Katarzyna (her emo haircut was so convincing, it’s going to become permanent, even if Ms. J doesn’t know what emo is). My least favorites were Claire (though I’m not exactly sure who’s she’s supposed to be high fashion with such a ludicrous outfit), and Stacey Ann (lazy, predictable, and not really having anything to do with house music).
I wasn’t as high on Fatima and Anya’s pictures. I thought they were both predictably over the top, though it was nice to see Fatima loosen up this week (and not antagonize everybody). I also didn’t really get the praise for Dominique’s picture — the background seemed beatific, but her face, as usual, was too hard for the setting. Finally, I thought music snob Lauren’s "pop music" shot was ok (strong body pose), but nothing outstanding.
In the end, it came down to Claire and Aimee and, since Claire has a stronger body of work so far, Aimee got sent home for a not-that-bad R&B shot that reminded me of the cover for "Thriller." It was also slightly off-putting to see Claire jump up and yell "yes!" when her name was called — and another girl was sent home sobbing.
So what’d you think of this episode? Will her actions tonight her Claire’s chances as Cover Girl of the Week next time? What genre of music would you have liked to have seen? Why is Stacey Ann still around? Finally, did you feel any sympathy for Dominique?
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