American Idol: The Guys Have It

Before the semifinals, I announced that the guys in the competition were going to definitely outperform the women (scroll to the end of the column) — and then they sang during 60's week.

I quickly changed my position, and anointed the ladies as the more talented batch of competitors, but after last night's male semifinal finale (and brutal performances from Amanda Overmyer and Co.), I'm going to have to go back to my original position.

All this flip-flopping is making me dizzy.

Let's get Luke Menard out of the way right off the bat, since there's no way he's advancing to the final 12 (right, America?!) I thought he was an interesting choice to open the show (instead of sticking him somewhere in the middle). I guess this way American can remember how awful he was. It may have been harsh, but Simon was absolutely right in pointing out that his performance was "weak and girly". For the second week in a row he covered a performer (George Michael this week, Freddie Mercury last time out) who have 2 million times more charisma.

I mean, even Ryan covertly mocked his song choice by pointing out that he'd sung an upbeat song last week when Luke claimed he was "changing things up."

The rest of the field is absolutely deserving of a spot in the final 12, though I'm betting America will send Chikizie home. He just doesn't seem to have as big a following as the rest of the male contestants not named Luke Menard. Also, the judges, especially Simon, just don't seem to like him. I thought it was unnecessarily petty of him to wait until Chikizie admitted that Whitney Houston once covered "All the Woman That I Need" to slam him. It's too bad too because, although he wasn't perfect last night, I think this guy has the potential to be one of the top five vocalists in the competition.

He's certainly a stronger singer than Danny Noriega, who I'm guessing will squeak through to the finals. Unlike Simon, I was digging his funky rearrangement of "Tainted Love", but Randy was correct to point out that, for all the sass and personality in his performances, he needs to take chances vocally. Also, thanks to him, last night I learned that TMTH = too much to handle.

Before this week, I would've said that Chikizie also warranted that spot over David Cook (pictured, left), but that was before the actual rocker (not to be confused with "faux rocker" Robbie Carrico) delivered an emo version of Lionel Richie's "Hello." It was my favorite performance of the night. Did we need an emo version of "Hello"? I didn't know that we did before last night, and the judges were right to point out that he'd probably have a hit on his hands with that version (even if I couldn't understand him at certain points because he slurred his lyrics). I thought Danny did a decent job with his remix, but David C. did an outstanding job with his take on an older classic.

I would even say that Chikizie also deserves the nod over Michael Johns, who's actually gotten a little worse every week. His "Don't You (Forget About Me)" wasn't nearly as bad as last week's Fleetwood Mac disaster, but it was an easier song to sing. Still, although I don't throw the word around as much as Simon does, it was PAINFULLY karaoke with all the mic stand theatrics. Also, the singing itself was just painful at times. Like Simon, I wish he'd do a soulful song soon. It doesn't really matter because the dude is really good looking, so he can book his ticket to the finals.

He wouldn't be the first performer to make it far in the competition with less than top notch vocals. Jason Castro is doing very nicely for himself without one of those "bring down an arena" voices. When he came out with his guitar, but he was sitting on that chair, I thought to myself, "he might as well have his guitar". Still, his "Hallellujah" was the evening's loveliest performances and he's doing everything right that Michael Johns is doing wrong. He's very good at picking songs that suit his voice and performing them in a way that fits his personality. I'd still caution him against becoming repetitive.

Which is exactly what the judges said to David Archuleta after a perfectly competent take on "Another Day in Paradise." When they teased before the commercial break that he was going to sing Phil Collins, I hoped it wouldn't be "Against All Odds" (performed on "Idol" about 73 times). And I thought it was smart of him to start off his performance at a piano to change things up a bit. Still, I sort of winced when it turned out he was doing a slower song (I would've preferred to have seen his take on "Invisible Touch") and Simon agreed. Paula said that "in his imperfection, he was perfect" — and I kinda knew what she meant. Also, as much as he might genuinely want to "bring attention to the people of the world who have nothing", actually saying that sort of thing out loud makes him seem impossibly corny and a little self-important.

Finally, there was David "The Stripper" Hernandez. In case you hadn't heard, David H. worked in as a male stripper/bartender/exotic dancer in a club in Phoenix for three years.

Here's my take on the situation. I don't care. What he was doing wasn't illegal and it has nothing to do with his singing ability. I don't think he should be thrown out of the competition (looks like he won't, unless we get some funky vote-rigging courtesy of the producers), just like I didn't think Frenchie Davis should've been thrown out in season 2 for posing on an adult site. On that same token, I don't think it makes sense for the producers to throw David out now just because they threw Frenchie out then. Let me get this straight: the Idol producers made a stupid decision then and the only way to make things right is to repeat a similar stupid decision? Ever heard of "two wrongs don't make a right?"

As for his performance last night, it wasn't his strongest showing vocally, but I still liked it. It takes guts for a girl to sing a song made popular by Celine Dion, so it takes an insane amount of guts for a guy to do it, and I think he mostly pulled off his rendition of "It's All Coming Back to Me Now." I think he'll make it to the final 12, and that this stripper controversy will actually help him in the long run. I mean, think about it — before this news broke, what was the most interesting, non-music related thing about him?

So what'd you think of this episode? Have the guys taken Season 7 supremacy back from the girls? Do you care if one of the contestants worked as a stripper in the past? Was I the only one who heard Simon (or one of the judges) say the word "stripper" just as David's song was ending (it appeared their mics were on toward the end of several songs)?Finally, is there ANY way Luke Menard makes it to the final 12?