Her? Really?I mean, we all knew that Ann’s winning streak had to come to an end eventually, but did that really need to happen at the hands of a woman who — according to the well-regarded and esteemed “What John Thinks” blog — kinda sucks?
More importantly, now that Ann’s top photo domination has been halted…what exactly do we have to look forward to? I mean, she’s still going to win this thing, right? For me, the only suspense involved seeing if she could win top photo honors every single week along the way.
The episode began with Kendal bragging about how she didn’t hug the much-maligned Kacey after her elimination last week and only gave her a half-hearted handshake. (Karma…is that you?!)
The girls then took a trip to the Grammy museum where they got to see some memorabilia (the Michael Jackson section was particularly popular) and received the week’s challenge from Mr. Jay and Neil Portnow, the president of the Recording Academy. (AKA: the guy who symbolizes it’s time for you to take your bathroom break when he pops up on the Grammys telecast.)
Portnow announced that the challenge was for the girls to pair up and dress their partner in what they thought a “Grammy girl” should look like. (Grammy girls are the ones who hand the winners their awards.) The reward for the challenge was the chance to be a Grammy girl on the next broadcast…at least I assume the reward involved handing out some trophies that are actually televised. (You never know.)
Jane and Esther came up with utterly forgettable dresses for each other, Chris and Kendal appeared to be the only two people in the room who didn’t realize their dresses were more suitable for a (strip) club than the Grammys. (Don’t they know only the artists can wear stuff like that?) Meanwhile, Ann was paired up with Chelsey, and Chelsey had a cow when Ann accidentally(?) got her a size 12 dress. That’s the same as a size 2 dress, right? I mean, there’s a 2 in it! Sure it’s upsetting, and if it were anyone else but Ann we’d be crying “sabotage”, but Chelsea actually didn’t look bad in it — the worst thing about it was Chelsey’s defeated/stank face.
That left Kayla and Liz as the winners. It didn’t look good at the beginning when Liz asked for long, flowy black dress and Kayla basically said, “Pfft, I ain’t doing that.” Liz was initially upset about having to rock a pair of pants (when’s the last time a Grammy girl wore pants), but eventually owned the outfit. Still, Kayla was declared the winner.
Liz took it well — all she did was get drunk back at the house and stumble around in a montage that wasn’t nearly as amusing as the editors hoped it would be.
The week’s shoot featured guest photographer Francesco Carrozzini, who “What John Thinks” special correspondent Erica (aka my girlfriend) reports has “dreamy eyes.” (I want to disagree, but I don’t want to hate either.)
The idea was for the models to channel some of the world’s most famous fashion designers. It ended up being fun enough — usually getting these girls to dress up as dudes or adopt characters is good for a few kicks. The only problem is that, although I’ve heard of Vera Wang and Marc Jacobs, I have no idea what these people are actually like, so I couldn’t really tell if the models were doing a god job of channeling them.
Fortunately (or unfortunately) some of the models were just as clueless as I was. Liz and Kendal, specifically appeared to be lost, but ended up with very different results.
Although I said that she “kinda sucks” last week, Liz (pictured, left) deserved the top photo honors she got for channeling John Galliano. (My response: I didn’t know Johnny Depp designed clothes! And he's wearing Bret Michaels' weave!) Liz’s photo was my favorite, but I also really liked what Kayla brought to the table as Vivienne Westwood and I thought Chris’ personality was a PERFECT match for Betsey Johnson.
The judges all fawned over Ann’s pic (as usual), I thought she seemed stronger in the photo shoot. Also, the photo Tyra picked for Ann (as Alexander Wang) featured the same wide-eyed, spooked expression we’ve seen from her before — what else ya got?
Still, Ann had infinitely more success with her gender-bending efforts than Jane (as Marc Jacobs) and Esther (as Christophe Decarnin), who ended up in the bottom two.
Luckily for Esther, she was in no danger of going home because Kendal absolutely bombed the shoot as Vera Wang. If we’re going by Kendal’s interpretation of Vera Wang, apparently Wang’s trademark is that she, um, stands there…with a blank look on her face. Just terrible.
Goodbye Kendal. You assume that your exit handshakes and hugs were heartfelt — but you’ll never really know, will you?
So what’d you think of this episode? Who knew there was such a thing as a Grammy museum? (Is there an Oscar museum out there I don’t know about?) Who’s your favorite designer to dress up as? Finally, if you could hand out a Grammy, which category would you pick and who would you want to give it to?
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