Desperate Housewives: True Britt

If the show wanted a flashback-heavy hour to celebrate its 100th episode a few months ago, then they really should’ve used last night’s Edie-centric installment.

If you recall, I was in the minority in that I kinda hated previously-unseen/outta-leftfield handyman Eli Scruggs and the emotionally manipulative 100th episode. Besides building a milestone episode around a completely new character, my main problems with it were that 1.) Eli was ridiculously, unrealistically saintly and that 2.) it wasn’t believable that a man who had such a big impact on the women’s lives (he may have saved the life of one of Lynette’s sons) had never even been mentioned before.

Last night’s episode was very similar in structure — each of the Housewives (except for Katherine) recalled a personal moment where Edie Britt touched their lives. However, the main reason THIS flashback episode worked for me was because it revolved around a character we actually knew and cared about (even if you hated her) and doubled as an effective tribute and farewell to said character.

Of course, the episode wasn’t perfect. I realize the show’s writers don’t want to dance on a (fictional) person’s grave (or urn, in this case), but they definitely flirted with some revisionist history by almost making the character a little too saintly. (Edie was the reason Lynette got the courage to fight cancer? Edie happened to be the reason Bree finally decided to support Orson in prison?!)

Overall though, the episode did a good job of not compromising the Edie character we all knew (she was still sleeping with other people’s husbands in these flashbacks) while revealing a side of her we never got to see. It’s a side that HAD to be there to explain why, despite all the drama, the rest of the Housewives (kinda) remained friends with her all this time.

We first saw how Susan and Edie had met and I liked the twist that Edie’s biggest nemesis on the Lane was actually her friend at first. Unfortunately, Susan severely disapproved of Edie’s homewrecking ways. More importantly, I think there was an element of Susan shooting the messenger in the dissolution of their friendship since Edie was the first person to tell her that Karl was cheating on her. (I kinda wish the episode had explored this a bit more.) Of course, Edie eventually sleeping with Karl may have also contributed to the dissolution of the friendship.

Up next, Lynette relayed a story about how she had been feeling sorry for herself and weak due to her cancer (Katherine cameo!) before Edie took her to a bar to do tequila shooters and play pool against a one-armed-man. (Why aren’t more oncologists using this treatment?) While I don’t completely buy that Lynette would become so meek and defeated, I liked the detail of everyone in the bar knowing Edie’s name. Also, Edie being the one to whip Lynette into shape makes sense since they’re, arguably, the two strongest, most plain-talking women on the block. (Bree is too passive aggressive and Gabby is too scheme-y.) It makes me wish Nicolette Sheridan and Felicity Huffman had had more scenes together.

Bree followed with a far-fetched story about how she found out that Edie had been regularly visiting Orson in prison during her banishment. While it was mildly amusing to watch Bree interact with the gruff female prison guard (she may as well been a different species to Bree) and Kyle McLachlan was more effective in his brief, sad scene last night than he has been in his ridiculous kleptomaniac storyline recently, this just didn’t work for me. I liked that we got a quick glimpse at Edie’s life during her “banishment” from Wisteria Lane, but this mostly felt like the writers stretching for a way to connect Edie and Bree. (They also kinda stretched to connect Edie with Lynette, but that felt more plausible.)

By contrast, I can totally see Edie and Gabby going out on the town (pictured, right) and getting into a competition to prove who the hottest woman on Wisteria Lane was. (Susan didn’t make it on the ballot, unfortunately). Gabby won (couldn’t either woman just grab a bunch of swizzle sticks from the bar) and was promptly abandoned at the bar by Edie. When Gabby caught up with her, instead of getting in a predictable screaming match/cat fight, the two had a heart-to-heart in which Edie revealed that she’d always known that she was going to die before the age of 50.

If you thought this was also a little too dramatically convenient, I can absolutely see your point. However, I think it was kind of perfect.

It helps explain Edie’s consequences-be-damned, live-for-now attitude. It explains her obsession with staying young(ish)-looking (she wasn’t ever planning on making it to 80). On the flip side, this was a rare private, bare-your-soul moment between Edie and Gabby, so it makes perfect sense that Gabby wouldn’t run out and tell the rest of her friends. If Edie had said something like “I’m going to kill myself”, then Gabby would look like an idiot for not telling anyone. However, the intimacy of the moment is consistent with why Gabby wouldn’t ever tell anyone until Edie was dead and she was holding her friend’s urn during a road trip.

Susan, Lynette, Bree, Gabby and Mrs. McCluskey were on their way to deliver the news of Edie’s death to her son Travers (still a stupid name). This led to the least effective part of the episode, in which Mrs. McCluskey tried to tell an angry Travers that Edie had COMPLETELY abandoned him as a baby because she wasn’t ready to be a mom. I get that Edie supposedly made this noble sacrifice for her freakishly rapid-aging son, but it still felt hollow. I mean, wasn’t there any way for her son to live with his dad and for Edie to still be some kind of presence in his life? I guess it was the one flashback that made Edie look bad — but I don’t think that was the writers’ intention. To be honest, I would’ve been happier if it had been revealed that the reason Travers hated his mom was because she named him “Travers.”

Overall, I liked the storytelling structure of the episode — instead of a stick and a campfire, we got an urn and an SUV — and the final scene with the women spreading Edie’s ashes throughout Wisteria Lane was touching, a little gross (I don’t want any Edie on my plants!) and totally consistent with the show (Susan kinda stealing Edie’s thunder).

So what’d you think of this episode? How the hell does Susan stay in shape if she doesn’t know how to cook good, healthy food (microwave burritos don’t count) AND she doesn’t like to run? Did you think this episode was an effective goodbye to Edie? (It kinda made me wish that Nicolette Sheridan had been given more to do recently.) Would you like Edie as the new dead narrator? (Yes, please.) Finally, who wants to be the first to buy Susan a thesaurus? (“One of a kind” CAN be boiled down to one word, Susan. Have you heard of the word “unique”?)