Well, damn.I mean, on Tuesday night, Mel B. loses "Dancing with the Stars" to charming, but nowhere-near-as-good-a-dancer Helio Castroneves, who I'm CONVINVED would've lost if news of his split from his fiancée would've come out before the finale, angering his female fans who assume he may be hooking up with partner Julianne Hough. Ok, I assume that too.
Then on Wednesday night, my favorite contestant on this cycle of "Top Model" goes home. Damn.
As if losing second-favorite contestant Lisa last week wasn't enough, now I have a final heavily featuring dim Chantal, bitchy Bianca and bland Jenah to look forward to (and I use the term "look forward to" loosely). This is probably the least inspiring "Top Model" final four since, um, last year when we were down to Jaslene, Renee, Natasha (yay! Natasha) and Dionne/Wholahay.
It was go-see time last night, and I quickly asked my girl Erica if she cared to predict who would fail to come back in time (a "Top Model" tradition unlike any other). Since Erica hates guessing, I picked Heather to have some sort of meltdown while roaming the streets of Shanghai and Chantal to be late, just because she's so damn dumb. It turned out I was 2/3 right, with Jenah barely joining them in the losers' circle after being disqualified.
That made for a pretty low-key challenge victory for Bianca, who can finally stop whining about not winning a challenge (though I'm sure she'll find something new to whine about).
In addition to Heather wandering around trying to read her Chinese map ("It's all Greek to me"), the go-sees were pretty entertaining thanks to Chantal's inappropriately bright pink underwear, and the harshness of several of the designers, including the one who flat out told Jenah she couldn't walk.
That designer seemed to have almost as much disdain for Jenah as Nigel (pictured) does. After hinting at the animosity last week, Nigel showed up to photograph the girls this week, in a shoot for which the girls had to prove they could stand out in case they're ever surrounded by Chinese dragons and lions.
For some reason, Jenah decided that acting like an arrogant know-it-all with bad hair who is above the competition was a better strategy then being a bland girl with bad hair. To be fair, Nigel comes off as a bit humorless (remember how he got all huffy about a joke CariDee made two cycles ago about him having a stick up his ass? Of course you don't, because you're not a dork who writes about this show every week.)
Still, her attitude was completely off-putting and was largely responsible for landing her in the bottom two along with Heather, who had a very strong pic again, but not as strong as Saleisha, who had CLEARLY the best pic and is emerging as something oddly resembling a front-runner. The worst pic was Bianca (sleepy), followed by Chantal, who the judges continue sucking up to for no good reason. Look at that pic! I know she's going for a model-y pose, but that shot is forced and terrible. Saleisha went for model-y and got it, Chantal is just blah.
In the end, Heather went home mostly for only making it to one go-see. Sure Jenah, at least one designer completely hated Jenah's walk, but she DID see more, right? Ugh. I'm done with this show. Who am I kidding, no I'm not!
What'd you think of this episode? Can you give me ONE good reason why I should keep watching? How funny was it that, during Jaslene's Cover Girl commercial, there appeared to be approximately one dozen people in Baltimore to watch her throw out the first pitch? (my brother caught that one) Are you ok with the girls trying to trick each other by giving the competitors wrong directions? Finally, who is going to be Cover Girl of the Week now that Heather's not around to win it every week? (It's SO going to be Saleisha, right?!)
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